Finding Joy (Love's Compass Book 5) Read online

  Love’s

  Compass

  Book Five

  Finding Joy

  Melanie D. Snitker

  Finding Joy

  (Love’s Compass: Book 5)

  © 2017 Melanie D. Snitker

  Published by

  Dallionz Media, LLC

  P.O. Box 6821

  Abilene, TX 79608

  Cover: Blue Valley Author Services

  All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the author, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law. Please purchase only authorized editions.

  For permission requests, please contact the author at the e-mail below or through her website.

  Melanie D. Snitker

  [email protected]

  www.melaniedsnitker.com

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events, and incidents either are the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.

  Love’s Compass: Book Five

  Finding Joy

  By Melanie D. Snitker

  All rights reserved

  Copyright © 2017 Melanie D. Snitker

  ASIN: B01NH3274U

  ISBN-10: 0-9975289-3-1

  ISBN-13: 978-0-9975289-3-0

  For Mom and Dad. Thank you

  for providing a childhood that inspired

  creativity, and a home full of happiness and love.

  Contents

  Prologue

  Chapter One

  Chapter Two

  Chapter Three

  Chapter Four

  Chapter Five

  Chapter Six

  Chapter Seven

  Chapter Eight

  Chapter Nine

  Chapter Ten

  Chapter Eleven

  Chapter Twelve

  Chapter Thirteen

  Chapter Fourteen

  Chapter Fifteen

  Chapter Sixteen

  Chapter Seventeen

  Epilogue

  Acknowledgments

  Connect with Melanie

  Books by Melanie D. Snitker

  Prologue

  When Parker Wilson’s eyes opened, he expected to see the familiar walls of his apartment. Or the curtains filtering the early morning sun coming through the window.

  It was dark with only a few slivers of light cutting into the black. What time was it? Had his alarm sounded? He didn’t remember turning it off.

  He tried to shift positions so he could see his clock sitting on the side table. But the moment he did so, pain bolted through his body and into his head.

  A groan worked its way out to fill the surrounding space. All at once, the realization he wasn’t lying on his bed at home crashed into him like a tidal wave. A heavy weight pushed against his chest as though it were an ounce away from crushing him. He shoved against it to no avail. What started as a peripheral sensation became searing pain along the right side of his body. Everything hurt. It was impossible to decipher where he was actually injured.

  Hot air mixed with an acrid smell and followed the path to his lungs with each struggling breath. He had to get out. Now!

  Sounds of metal bending and squealing exploded in his head. Parker tried to cover his ears to block out the noise, but raising his arms higher than his heart was impossible.

  What was happening?

  The air around him grew heavy with heat and Parker gulped against the combination of bile and panic rising in his throat.

  God, save me!

  Chapter One

  One year later…

  Parker lurched upright in bed, his chest heaving and sweat trickling down the sides of his face. The bedroom was still semi-dark as the sun peeked over the horizon, ushering in another chilly day in central Texas. He raised a hand and felt his right cheek. His fingers followed the grooves of the scars that ran from his eyebrow, cut close to his ear, and ended just above the carotid artery in his neck. That his carotid remained intact was the only reason he’d survived the car wreck. A fact many doctors at the hospital had made a point of telling him. Others insisted it was the grace of God. That it was a second chance at life and he should make the best of it.

  Considering his entire life had come crashing down that night, maybe God should’ve picked another candidate. Bitterness ran through his veins, mirroring the way even deeper scars ran from his right shoulder to his elbow. He rotated his shoulder, and the scars burned in protest as the skin pulled tighter than it should. The memories of the horrific car accident tried to push their way to the front of his mind. Parker had gone two nights without the nightmares that had plagued him for the last year. They hadn’t been peaceful nights, dreaming he was lost in a giant building and searching for the escape that didn’t seem to exist, but it’d been progress. So much for the hope he was finally moving past them.

  The sounds of the jaws of life cutting him out of the car still reverberated through his skull. He shuddered, goosebumps peppering his skin. The nightmares were bad enough, but the lingering sensations after he woke were nearly as acute.

  His beagle, Happy, jumped onto the bed. With a warm tongue, he licked Parker’s arm as though he were trying to wash away his owner’s foul mood. Good old Happy. The only one around him who hadn’t treated him differently since the night that changed his life in more ways than one.

  With a deep inhale, Parker pushed the memories — and the effects of the nightmare — into the dark recesses of his mind. Where they ought to stay.

  He hugged Happy and gave him a hearty pat before getting out of bed. Parker’s first goal was to put the silicone-based gel on his scars. His doctor wanted him to consider laser surgery to reduce the depth of them. More time in any kind of medical setting didn’t appeal to him. He’d rather wear long-sleeved shirts to cover them up.

  He forced his attention on his to-do list for the day. This was the start of his second week back in his hometown of Kitner, Texas. After years of avoiding his family’s ranch, waking up in his old room was still surreal. Mom had insisted he take it easy when he first moved in again, but if he had to be here, he’d earn his keep. They had five longhorn cattle coming in this afternoon, and he needed to oversee the process. Of all the goings-on at the ranch, the longhorns were the animals Parker dreaded working with the most.

  He couldn’t believe there was a time when he enjoyed everything about the ranch and working cattle. Especially the longhorns — Dad’s personal project. But that was before his dad died of a heart attack when Parker was seventeen. After that, everything reminded him of Dad, and the loss burrowed into his chest with every ranch-related task he took on.

  The ranch had been a success long before his dad passed and, in the midst of her grief, his mom struggled to keep up with it all. She’d hired people to manage the different daily needs of the ranch. Parker never blamed her for that — she did what she had to do. But it was never the same without Dad. Mom was never the same.

  Parker had been the face of the family business since he was old enough to stand in a pair of cowboy boots and hold a lasso. A photogenic child, his parents had used him in promotions about their award-winning Angus cattle. Later, success on the rodeo circuit had meant high-paying endorsement opportunities.

  He’d had a successful career. More than successful — he couldn’t go anywhere without women recognizing him from the magazines and adve
rtisements or men bringing up the products he endorsed. Until the accident put a quick end to that, too. Who wanted images of a man with a marred appearance on the cover of their publication? Losing the endorsements had been bad enough. But the damage to his arm had put an end to his rodeo career as well.

  He’d struggled to make a living for nearly a year before admitting defeat. Having to stay and work at home again only added insult to injury. He’d never tell his mom or sister that, though. God help them, they thought they were making things easier. It’d break their hearts if they knew the whole arrangement only made him feel even more like a failure.

  The temptation to hide out in his room for the morning was strong. He wasn’t ready to face the flood of memories that the longhorns were sure to bring forth. But he and Happy had an appointment at the hospital first thing, and there were children looking forward to their visit. His trip there every Monday morning was one of the few things that brought relief to Parker’s daunting week. He’d focus on that and then deal with work when he returned. It was time to cowboy up.

  He hoped he could get out of the house without running into anyone. The nightmare had left him grumpy, and he knew he wouldn’t be good company.

  Voices reached him the moment he got downstairs. He paused before entering the sitting room, faced with the image of his little sister as she twirled in her wedding dress. He still thought of her as a kid. When did Kara get old enough to date, much less become engaged? He had to remind himself that she was twenty-three. At five years his junior, she was certainly old enough to move on and create a family of her own. She was happy and her fiancé, Ben, was a stand-up guy. Goodness knows he put up with a lot when it came to their family.

  Their mom, Gwen, was fiercely protective of her little girl and Ben was the first guy to make it through her intense scrutiny. That alone earned Ben a large measure of respect as far as Parker was concerned. He knew they were going to be happy together.

  Mom held her hands clasped in front of her as she observed Kara. “You look amazing, honey. I can’t wait to see Ben’s face when he spots you coming down that aisle.” Moisture gathered in her pale blue eyes.

  Kara rolled her own eyes. It might be a sign of frustration, but her expression proved she loved the mothering. At least most of it. The two had always been close, leaning on each other after Dad died. Their connection had made it easier for Parker to pull away from the family business as soon as he could.

  “Mom. Please. It’s still almost a month away.” But her objections became muffled as arms went around her, pulling her in for an embrace.

  Parker hid a grin behind his hand. Most people knew Mom to be a shrewd business woman, and they would be right. But she was also one of the most sentimental people he’d ever known. He had no doubt she’d be crying at the wedding. Boy, he was glad he wasn’t the first of the two of them to get married.

  “You’re my baby. I’m not sure I’ll ever get used to the idea of you moving away. I’m not ready for my little girl to get married.” Mom cleared her throat, blinked tears away, and turned. She spotted Parker in the doorway. “Isn’t she beautiful?”

  “Yeah, she is.” That was the truth. She’d had boys following her around from the time she turned eight. After Dad died, Parker stepped in as her protector. He’d had to threaten more than a handful of them to treat his sister with respect. He didn’t think Mom knew about most of them, and that was probably for the best.

  Mom nodded her satisfaction and fixed Parker with one of her no-nonsense stares. “Did you find a date for the wedding yet?”

  He suppressed a sigh — something that took a great deal of effort. This was one of the myriad of reasons why he’d hoped to sneak out before being noticed. He wasn’t up to this conversation, especially this early in the morning. Why Mom felt like he needed a date to his own sister’s wedding was beyond him. But Kara wanted one of those big, fancy weddings, and Mom was thrilled with the decision. She was determined that everything would be perfect and apparently, the brother of the bride attending solo shattered a wedding rule that no one had bothered telling him about.

  Parker was certain, if he ever got married, he’d have a nice backyard ceremony with family and close friends only. No insane rules and regulations. No press. Just a quiet event where he could focus on his bride.

  Would Mom be disappointed? Probably. Not that it mattered. Parker never pictured himself the marrying type before his accident. It certainly wasn’t on the radar now. He swallowed down his frustrations.

  “No, I haven’t found a date. I was hoping you’d change your mind about that.” He didn’t have a girlfriend. Not a surprise with the road maps gouged into the side of his face and arm. Any woman who gave him a second look only did so to study the valleys in his skin. Then she’d act embarrassed once she realized he’d caught her staring. It was as if women had no idea what to do with him or how to talk to him. Because, of course, having scars on his face meant he spoke in a different language now. But he hated the head shakes of pity the most. He’d take disgust or embarrassment any day.

  There was no way Mom would let this one go. She smoothed some of the fabric on Kara’s dress. “One of my friends has a daughter your age. I’ll call tomorrow and see if she’s free.”

  “Absolutely not.” The insistence in his voice brought a surprised expression to her face. “I’ll either find a date on my own, or I’ll go alone. But I do not want you setting me up with some random, unmarried woman.”

  Mom didn’t appear convinced but said nothing.

  Kara shot him a look of sympathy. Her face pouty, she mouthed, “I’m sorry.”

  Good grief. The last thing he wanted to do was cause trouble for her wedding. He gave her a wink, hoping to set her at ease.

  When both women were convinced the dress still fit perfectly, Mom left the room.

  As soon as she was out of earshot, Kara turned to Parker. “I hate that she bugs you all the time. I figured, with me getting married, she’d ease up a little.”

  “One would think.” But that was Mom. She’d been like that since he’d turned twenty. In the eight years since, he’d had to deal with her trying to set him up with several girls. She’d stopped pressuring him for a few months after his accident. But now, she was pouring it on as strongly as ever, saying he needed to get back to normal. That it would help. Yeah, he doubted that. Especially when normal no longer existed.

  Kara laid a hand on his shoulder. “You don’t have to bring a date. You know it doesn’t matter to me.”

  He knew she meant that and appreciated it. He pulled his little sister into a hug. “Thanks. But I want your day to be perfect — free from negative comments no matter who they’re directed toward.” He stepped back and held his arms out. “I’ll find a date. Myself.”

  Kara’s smile warmed him. He’d do anything for her.

  “Thanks, Parker. I’m glad you’re home again. I love you.”

  “I love you, too. Now I’m getting out of here before I get sucked into any wedding preparations.”

  Parker kissed her cheek and found his mom to kiss her on the way out.

  “Don’t forget about the longhorns coming in,” she reminded him.

  He fought to keep the bitterness simmering inside from boiling over into his voice. Just because he dreaded having anything to do with the longhorns didn’t mean he had to cue anyone else in on it. “I won’t. I’ll be there.”

  Since coming back home, he’d agreed to take over organizing everything at the barn. From feeding schedules, breeding programs, and coordinating the different people hired on at the ranch, it was more than a full-time job. Parker did a lot of the repairs himself as well and that’s what he focused on his first week back. Mom frequently reminded him it wasn’t in his job description. Parker didn’t care. He usually took Happy with him, and the two of them were more than content to work with no one else to bother them.

  But all of that would wait. First, he needed to stop and grab a cup of coffee at the Stripes on his wa
y into town, then it was off to the hospital. He’d take bringing a moment of happiness to a child over anything in his own life right now.

  ~

  Chelsea Blake adjusted the Bluetooth piece in her left ear. “Seriously, Laurie. What was I thinking? I should’ve said no. Can you see me working on a farm?”

  There was no mistaking her older sister’s poor attempt to cover a laugh. “No. Not in a million years. But this is a ranch. Tuck said the family’s been around for generations. They hired you as their coordinator. It’s not like you’ll get there, and they’ll have you mucking out the stalls.”

  “You’d better be right.” Chelsea rolled her eyes. She might have petted a horse twice in her life — and that was being generous. Or was it a pony? What was the difference, anyway? She had no desire to ride one, much less clean up after a whole barn full of them. Imagining the piles of manure was enough to cause her nose to wrinkle.

  The Wilson Ranch was fifteen miles outside of town. She’d never even noticed it before, so it must be off the main highway. Right now, fifteen miles felt like an eternity.

  “You’ll do fine.” Muffled crunching accompanied the assurance.

  Chelsea chuckled, imagining Laurie sitting with a bowl of food balanced on her large belly. At thirty-two weeks into her pregnancy, Laurie was always eating something. “I sure hope so. I’ve got to make this work.”

  “You are putting way too much pressure on yourself, Chels. You need to do what’s best for you.”

  “Sure. But Mom and Dad will be here in less than three weeks. I need to have a full-time job by then.” Thinking about their parents visiting from whatever country they were currently touring filled Chelsea with trepidation.

  Laurie sighed. “I’m proud of you and how far you’ve come. They will be, too.”

  Chelsea didn’t believe it for a minute. And she knew Laurie didn’t, either. Their parents had a fit when Laurie chose to leave their wealthy lifestyle and pursue a career as a photographer. As the sibling left behind when Laurie moved away, it wasn’t pretty. She got to hear all kinds of things about how they were disappointed in their oldest daughter and how Laurie was setting herself up to fail.